I was surfing Engaget today and I have something amazing to show you:

Nubrella: tomorrow's fashion mistake, today!

Posted Feb 20th 2008 6:48PM by Paul MillerFiled under: Wearables
This is frankly brilliant. A hands-free umbrella is perfect for walking to work while yapping on your phone with one hand and cradling a cup of coffee with the other. Unfortunately it's just never going to make it past the "my friends will laugh at me" stage, because they will. They will laugh so very hard. It's a cruel, backwards society we live in, and it's no wonder we don't have flying cars yet. That said, you can destroy your own fashion credibility today for a mere $59.99. Maybe the fanny pack types will accept you, but we can't make any guarantees.

I mean....


And I don't know what they're talking about - I don't see why anyone would laugh at you! And only $59.99? It's a steal!

But seriously though, can you imagine walking down a busy city street wearing that thing? Even barring the people are staring at me like I'm a freak factor, you've got the I'm wearing a giant bubble that takes up twice the space I normally would factor. And what about getting into a cab, bus, or other such transportation? I don't know how easy that thing is to take on and off, but it can't be that easy. And if it is super easy to take off, that begs the question how stable is it when it's on? Is it liable to tip over, or fly off unexpectedly?

No. That umbrella thingie is a bad idea.

Now THIS is much more useful:

Nihon Uni shirts resist stabbing, make you feel like a superhero

Posted Mar 25th 2008 3:46PM by Darren MurphFiled under: Wearables
Mind you, this isn't the first time we've seen garb constructed to withstand vicious knife fights, and apparently a few Japanese streets are becoming just as frightening as some in London. Reportedly created to provide protection against stabbers following an "increasing number of malicious crimes that have victimized children and late-night convenience store clerks," Nihon Uni has developed a t-shirt crafted from "ultrahigh molecular weight polyethylene fiber." Aside from rendering blades useless, the material is also completely machine washable and lightweight; still, the fabric can be penetrated by "sharp points," so it's up to you to steer clear of rooftop archers. Nevertheless, long-sleeved versions can be had this June for ¥22,000 ($221) to ¥59,000 ($593), while the way less protective short-sleeved variety will run you between ¥19,000 ($191) and ¥52,000 ($522).

Just ask yourself, do I want to be protected in case I get into a vicious knife fight, or am assaulted by someone with a bladed weapon?

I think clearly the answer is yes.