My favorite human being whom I have never met is......

MARK MORFORD!

From his bio: Mark Morford is a columnist for sfgate.com and the San Francisco Chronicle. He also teaches yoga, subscribes to magazines, admires trees, detests shrill alarmism (including his own), sleeps naked. He has not seen your blog, but is sure it's amazing. He never wears sneakers. He writes about politics, pop culture, sex, music, design, a wry and punch-drunk universe, vibrators, scotch, media, spirituality and small European cars. And sometimes, genital grooming.

Morford's articles are wickedly funny, unapologetic, witty, occasionally brutal, and of course Morford himself is.... oh, how shall I say this....

GORGEOUS.

^_^

Seriously, though. He is a brilliant writer. Whenever I read one of his articles, I am either laughing out loud, or I get the overwhelming urge to leap to my feet, stab my finger in the direction of the computer screen while yelling, "YEAH! WHAT MARK SAID!" He is, quite frankly, awesome. So visit his archives and enjoy.