I was a crazy bad ass special agent who had the power to turn back time by several minutes at will. I had an important mission to save the Dalai Lama from something dire, but I needed the help of an old friend of mine, a female mercenary.

I found her house looking fairly ominous. Before I could walk up to the door and knock, the mercenary and a second woman came leaping out of second floor windows, landing to my right and left, while a man appeared in the front doorway. They all started shooting me. I pulled my guns and started to shoot back, then stopped. Faintly irritated, I thought 'well THIS isn't going to work' and turned back time.

I finally got the mercenary to join me, and we went to visit a Haitian soothsayer who could see the future. We reached her house and walked in without knocking. She had hundreds of tiny snakes held in jars of embalming fluid all over the house. I immediately got the creeps and told the mercenary that we had to leave. She told me not to be stupid, and we wandered around until we found the Haitian. As soon as she saw me, she threw a handful of tiny venomous snakes into my face, and I turned back time.

We decided to forget about the Haitian.

I finally reached were I was supposed to be and found that I had to impersonate the Dalai Lama. This sort of seemed somewhat blasphemous, but I was doing it to save his life. I disguised myself by putting on some robes.... and that was it. Prepared and clearly looking exactly like the Dalai Lama, I went out to sit cross legged on the roof of a car for some kind of procession. I was openly armed with two swords, two guns in shoulder holsters, and a Rambo knife. Everyone was fooled by my ingenious disguise. At the end of the procession, the bad guys finally saw through my charade, and I was forced to engage in an epic action movie battle that would have made an action hero you could name proud.


It was awesome.