I took a late lunch break today.  Not suspecting the horror that was about to transpire, I calmly wandered into the kitchen with my cell phone, thinking about my frozen lean cuisine lunch and wondering if maybe, just maybe, this time it wouldn't taste like cardboard.

All was proceeding as it should. The frozen lunch went into the microwave and I sat down at the table to wait when I heard something, something that didn't belong.  Something.... buzzing.  Slowly, filled with dread, I turned and looked over at the window directly behind me, only to come face to face with a hornet.


My mind froze, but thankfully my body didn't.  I leapt to my feet and yanked the blinds closed, trapping the wretched thing, and bolted towards my boss's office.  I paused in his doorway, breathing hard, my eyes wild.  He was on the phone, but gave me a concerned look.  I rushed past his office into mine, snatched up a pad of paper and a sharpie, and hurriedly scribbled an urgent missive to make him aware of the situation.



Recognizing this simply could not wait, my boss got off the phone and bravely marched into battle.  Rolling up a magazine, standing at the ready, he yanked the blinds open.

"There!  It's there!"  I hovered in the doorway, pointing unnecessarily.

"Yep, that's a hornet," my boss said.  He mustered more courage than I had dreamed possible and slammed the magazine into the wicked yellow and black beast.  I let out a small shriek and my boss stepped back, magazine still in hand, prepared to strike again...

But the hornet was simply gone.

We searched in vain for the body, but found nothing.

I've seen enough horror movies to know what that means.